When you and your lover or boyfriend/girlfriend break up there are several shitty things you must do or go through as part of the healing getting over their ass process. I have compiled what I think are probably the most distrubing.

The Worst Parts of Breaking Up

1. No more regular sex. No quickies, no weekend fuck festarama 2014, no moments of really long, really satisfying, deeply connected SEX SEX SEX whenever and wherever you are. No experimenting, no charging up the toys, no new positions to be tried, no having sex on different new furniture, no fantasies to fulfill in the back row at the movies or sneaky touches under a table or while standing in a crowded public place. I liked, no loved sex with my ex, well while we were together so not technically my ex. We were well matched according to the Zodiac and it was true.

2. The first times you go out with your “couple” friends and you are not a couple anymore.

3. No more morning coffee runs while you cooked breakfast waiting for him to get back.

4. Missing his kids because you liked them and they liked you and they are kids and they don’t understand all this.

5. Hiding or at least isolating all the pictures of him, and you and him, and his kids, and you and him and his kids, and him and his kids. Bascially you put them all in one folder but there seems to always be a straggler and you will come across it and it will make you sad for that moment captured in that photo.

6. Throwing out or giving back or sometimes still wearing his special Tshirt. Especially if it smells like him, it stings the heart instantly and inevitably the tears follow.

7. Gifts they gave you, at first your instinct is to give them back because your mad or you want it all gone them, the reminders, the love. I look around my place and it has previous gifts that people who loved me gave to me or made for me and I’m glad I kept them.

8. Collecting the memorabilia ticket stubs, wrist bands from festivals, your first overnight trip and putting it somewhere where you won’t see them everyday but not in the garbage because you aren’t ready yet.

9. Feeling great, feeling like you are healed, even flirting with a new guy, fantasizing about a new man maybe someone you know or someone you haven’t met yet and then suddenly he creeps back into your mind. It’s sad.

10. Having to tell your story over and over to friends, family and sometimes strangers as you work hard to steady your voice. They love you and support you and lend you their shoulder readily because they are the love you always have, no matter who you date or don’t date. So this may actually be a good thing being reminded of he beautiful smart people who love you with all their heart and want you to be happy so they sit patiently holding your hand until you are ready to fly again.